Conventions of Composition Rule 201 Practice

1. Wrong: Krakauer tells how McCandless's story ends when he talks about what they found four months later: "Four months later his decomposed body was found by a party of moose hunters."

Better: Before telling about Chris McCandless, Krakauer tells the reader how McCandless's story ends: "Four months later his decomposed body was found by a party of moose hunters" (iv).

Explanation: Provide context of what's going on in the telling of the story. The page citation does the work of telling where in the physical book a passage comes from, so the writer's job is instead to tell where in its message.

2. Wrong: Lizzy's first refusal comes when she talks about Darcy's proposals to him for the first time and feels the honour (British spelling) of the fact that he asked her, but she declines by saying, "I am very sensible of the honour of your proposals, but it is impossible for me to do otherwise than decline them."

Better: Lizzy's first refusal comes as soon as Mr. Collins asks her, when she says, "I am very sensible of the honour of your proposals, but it is impossible for me to do otherwise than decline them" (81).

Explanation: The original lead is too long and repetitive; the essay provides the reader a glimpse into what's going on in the story at that moment.

3. Wrong: This is what happens. "Arthur's house had settled into a steady routine. It was Arthur's accepted role to lie squelching in the mud making occasional demands to see his lawyer, his mother or a good book; it was Mr. Prosser's accepted role to tackle Arthur with the occasional new ploy such as the For the Public Good talk, or the March of Progress talk, the They Knocked My House Down Once You Know, Never Looked Back talk and various other cajoleries and threats."

Better: After his initial interaction with Prosser, the men continue to play their parts: "Arthur's house had settled into a steady routine. It was Arthur's accepted role to lie squelching in the mud making occasional demands to see his lawyer, his mother or a good book; it was Mr. Prosser's accepted role to tackle Arthur with the occasional new ploy such as the For the Public Good talk, or the March of Progress talk, the They Knocked My House Down Once You Know, Never Looked Back talk and various other cajoleries and threats" (13).

Explanation: The reader should have a sense of what's going in the story at the moment the quoted text comes up.